Spextacular!

Yesterday was the last Spex showing which means the end of my Spex-experience. These two weeks has passed so fast and it is hard to believe that this was it. I must admit, though, that I am quite exhausted (and it is not just because last night's farewell party that lasted till morning). Even though I knew Spex was going to take a lot of time I wasn't really prepared how much of my energy it would take. If three months ago I knew what I know now, and someone asked me if I wanted to take part of this, I might think it twice but definitely say yes. I have learned incredible lot about dancing and, more importantly, about myself as a dancer during these intensive months.

It was surprising to notice that all the showings were so unique. The premiere was a total success and the energy in the back stage was unbelievable. Every single spexer was extremely excited and gave the audience one of the best shows in Spex history. On the contrary, the next showing in Tampere was a disaster. Set pieces were stumbled, technique didn't work, the audience was sticky, the band was smashed, two scenes were skipped by an accident and the excitement was gone. The situation was fixed back in Helsinki but the feeling wasn't the same as in the premiere. Even though it is not supposed to effect that much, the way the audience acted played a big role in the whole thing. A loud and cheering audience made all give a bit more to their performance which also reflected to the enjoyment of the audience. Some showings were notably better than others and at least my feeling in every show was different. Yesterday's final showing was a blast but the long week had taken it's toll and I was already quite tired both physically and emotionally, and my output was according.

The last two weeks have given me couple of special and unforgettable memories. One of these is Wednesday's showing where most of my friends came to see me dancing. I can't remember the last time I was so nervous! When I walked to the stage my hart was beating so fast and hard I was afraid I wasn't able to concentrate on dancing at all. However, I got even more energy to my dancing because of that.

Maybe the best lesson Spex taught me was the chance to dance in front of an audience. Before I had no idea how I could react or how the pressure would affect me. It also proved that I am able to learn a choreography and perform it as well as anyone else even though I don't have as much dancing experience. However, I have also learned that group dancing is not my thing as much as couple dancing is. Now that Spex is done, I will have more time for my lovely dancing partners who I have been forced to put in the second priority. Maybe now I will also figure out what I really want from dancing. But before I do that, I just want to take some time from any pressures and dance just to get the joy and enjoyment from it.