Take More Chances, Dance More Dances.

Since I got back from NZ I had a feeling that I haven't been doing end experiencing enough while in Brisbane. This was the trip I had been planning and waiting for ages and here I was just doing nothing exiting. Sure, studying is interesting but that's not the only reason I came here. One night after one of those not-that-exciting-days I said to myself girl, you need to dance more, and so I decided to leave behind the slow and lazy evenings and head out.

It is not hard to find dancing to do in Brisbane and so I ended up spending all my evenings dancing (sounds like something I would easily end up doing, huh?) wondering afterwards why going down the stairs was so painful thing to do. If I want to get everything out of my time here, I reasoned, I need to be proactive. So, I explored new dance schools, tried new dance styles and even facebooked suggested events for dance parties (great way of crashing into some nice house parties and meeting new people by the way!). I danced on ice, by the pool, in a park, under the starts, in a bowling club and in restaurants. After the intensive exploration week, I now have three weekdays booked for regular dance classes and two dance festival passes for May waiting in my pocket. One thing I love and hate about myself is that I just have to do everything in extremes. There is no such thing as golden mean for me.

Remember I made a New Year's promise that I would learn a new dance this year? Well, I think I've found the dance I want to learn: West Coast Swing. One of those festival passes is for Swingsation, a WCS dance festival held in Gold Coast on 17th -19th May. One thing I know about dance festivals is that if I go there as a total beginner I end up feeling horrible among all the great dancers, and also I won't get so much out from the workshops than if my level was higher. So I have a challenge to boost myself to an intermediate level during the couple of months. Let's see how I'll do.

After all the time I've already have spent here, I still find it surprising how many people come to ask me if I was a dance instructor. The latest incident was at Dancing by the River latin social dancing event on Sunday when a lady approached me asking where my studio is located. Confusing. I wonder if its the tough feedback culture in Finnish dancing circles that has either made me surprised of the super positive feedback or made me a good dancer. At least it sure is more encouraging atmosphere here, I feel.

Last but not the least, a video of my and Big O's zoukking in the Amateur Freestyle Latin Championships last Saturday. The song we got was a way too fast for our style (the only lambada song out of twenty-something zouk songs in the competition, what a luck...) which shows as a rush and unfinished movements in the performance, but I left the night with only positive feelings in my heart. At least we stood out from everyone else, and more importantly, had fun!

Finally, since I just came from Leo&Becky's Zouk class, I just must say, once again, how great teacher they are. I love they way they point out those small but crucial details that can put your dancing into the next level. I really with they stayed here for longer because these kind of teachers and dancers are hard to find. Have a safe trip back home guys and hopefully see you some day soon!

Sometimes it just happens. I go dancing, full of energy, having a good day behind me, and then something goes wrong. Dancing becomes just a series of movements. Something crucial is missing. I can't feel the music in my heart. I can't connect with anyone. I can't enjoy.

I start to look around and see all these good dancers around me. I get angry - why can't I dance as good as them? Why can't I be as fun to dance with? Why can't I look as good as them? Why am I even trying when all I do is average? No one wouldn't even notice if I weren't there. Why can't I be the best?

I try to restrain my wondering mind but I can't concentrate. Then I start to feel guilty. Guilty for not living in that moment, for not giving myself into that dance. My smile is fake, my dancing is fake, everything in me is fake. I feel like I'm doing something rude, being unfair. I would want to tell someone, show that I'm suffering, open up my heart. But I can't, I'm too afraid. Then, I start to fear that someone will see through my fake smile.

I panic. I have to get out of here.

That is the worst thing for me that can happen. The most horrible thing is not being able to enjoy dancing and not being able to dance straight from my heart. For me it is impossible just to "step and go into the music". Dancing is something more, its about expressing the feelings that music wakes in me. If I feel angry and frustrated, I could dance and express those feelings but social dancing is not the place.

Also, jealousy is a fast way of ruining a dance confidence and if that is lost, there is no way of giving the best you've got. You just become more jealous and underachieve again and again. For me dancing is more about feeling good inside than looking flashy outside. Its about enjoyment.

That night I left home early and cried. That is just something that has to happen sometimes. If that hasn't ever happened to you, well, I feel sorry for you.

Dance Like No One Is Going To Put It On YouTube.

So I'm back in Brisbane from my holiday in New Zealand. What a trip it was! I would have tons of cool stories to tell but unfortunately none is to do with dancing, so dance-wise I have nothing exciting to tell from the activity-full trip. I did try to find some social dancing while in Christchurch but I simply happened to be there at the wrong time of the week.

However, I know that soon I'll have tons of cool dancing stories to tell. Remember me complaining about Kadu and Larissa leaving for their European tour just when I finally would have been in the same city to take their classes? Well, you can imagine how relieved I got when I heard that there is going to be someone, or rather a certain dance couple, replacing them while they are gone. And not just any dance couple but one whose style I happen to like a lot. A dance couple whose style is really different to Kadu&Larissa's. A teacher with who it is extremely enjoyable to dance with. Can you give it a guess who I'm talking about with this very easy hint: last (and first) time I took their classes were in Helsinki Zouk festival (well actually his and his previous dance partner's classes). So yeah, I'm really excited since they are going to have classes here for the next five weeks! Last Friday night there was a welcome party for them in Rio Rhythmics so my plan was to get there early to get some extra dances with him. My plan was unsuccessful, however, since he was DJ'ing the whole night and couldn't dance at all! Well, it was a great party anyway but I really hope to get some opportunities to grab him to the dance floor at some point while they're here.

Big O. is now staying here with me for a couple of months and of course I was excited to show him the good dancing that's happening in Brissy. On Wednesday I took him to Casablanca, a bar/restaurant where they organize Latin dancing nights, firstly because it was the first dance night after coming back and also because I hadn't yet been there myself. It reminded me of Helsinki's bar Havanna; the kind of place where you'd go dancing every week with your friends (except a lot more hot place to dance, I really wish they'd get aircon!), nothing too fancy but a place to have some great and cozy dance evenings. Unfortunately this Wednesday wasn't a great success and only few dancers had showed up (maybe the heavy raining that evening did its part). I was like it's not like this usually, I promise! Well, I guess Friday night proved me right.

Last night we got an invite to one local dancer's house party. He had this huge kitchen with lots of space to dance and that's what we did. It was great way of getting to know to some of the dancers here, have a great evening and some good dancing. You know, in dance parties you may meet lots of people but it can be hard make friends with them. I especially liked chatting with some of the girls and hear about their thoughts and tips about dancing in Brisbane since in dance parties its even harder to meet other girls. Everyone were excited about Big O's quite different Zouk moves so we got into YouTube that night (just after me spotting the heading's dance quote earlier that day):

This month there is also some exciting dance events to come. Next weekend I'm going to my first ever West Coast Swing workshop to see if that dance is for me. The weekend after that there is an amateur Latin dance competition in Brisbane where I'm trying to get Big O. to participate with me. And of course Leo&Becky's (yes you got that right!) workshops are a must in this month.

So, its already been a month since I left Helsinki. Can you believe that?