(Is It) Good to Be Back (?)

My silence here might reflect the quiet dancing life I've had since I came back home. My life, then again, hasn't been that quiet. I've hardly been home nor in Helsinki, and I've taken every chance to go somewhere away from the city. Does this mean running away? Maybe. I couldn't say that I have been taking that good care of myself either; during the last couple of weeks I have exhausted myself both physically, emotionally and socially. I can't remember the last time my body has felt so stiff, strength-less and hard as it did couple of days ago. This can't, and won't, go on. I need to stop and see my life in a new light. There is no use running away or avoiding the present.

I do have to admit that I got bit depressed coming back to Helsinki's small Zouk scene. It just feels so tiny after Brisbane. Every time I open Facebook I see my friends posting pictures and videos from different dance parties and events where I can't go any more. It is not a jealous feeling I get and I do love seeing my friends' joy from their smiles, but it just somehow makes me feel down. A good example is maybe a video I saw from Brisbane's Zouk flash mob rehearsal. They had almost hundred people, whilst we had almost ten. Hurray. Seriously, all you Brissy dancers should realize how great dance community you have there!

Enough with complaining though! I am now in a situation where I can make a new and exciting life for myself. I have no idea how it is going to turn out, but I have all the opportunities to make it as I wish. I don't know what dance styles I'm going to continue or start. All I know is that I'm going to be in Helsinki at least until the next summer. And there is a lot in Helsinki.

Furthermore, there have been some pleasant dance surprises. A week ago I found myself from a great Kizomba party in Helsinki. Lots of dancers, good visiting teachers, great atmosphere. What a nice feeling it was to dance again with my favourite Kizomba leaders and to notice that the connection still was as good as it was the last time. It seems that Kizomba has gained more popularity and that the dance scene is growing steadily. What great news for me! I also had a special guest with me in the party: one of my Aussie dance friends came to visit me for the weekend. Thanks for coming beautiful, it was so nice to have you here!

This weekend, then again, I found myself from a WCS event in Tampere. Yes, I was pretty sceptical about it beforehand, but when I got there I was really happily surprised! There is good West Coast Swinging in Finland after all, yay! It has been a while I have been feeling high from dancing, but the event did the trick even though I was able to attend only the Saturday's and Sunday's social dancing. There are some more nice West Coast events to come this fall where I'm definitely considering going to, and apparently I could find some regular classes from Helsinki too. I have so much to learn from this marvellous dance style! The weekend made me feel even more motivated to improve and get rid of my Zouk manoeuvres that push through to my West Coast. I also had a spontaneous WCS dance practise after the actual event with a dancer who I tempted to stay in Tampere for an extra day to hang out and dance. If only he lived in Helsinki and I would have the perfect practice partner for West Coast...

So now I'm again back in Helsinki. Maybe it is the time to slow down for a while before my studies and work starts. Time to think what kind of life I want to build. Time to wonder what I want from dancing. Time to keep on loving my life as it is.