The First Dance.

There is no denying it: I've been having quite a hard month. But the good thing is that I have started to heal myself and learned both to let go and to hold back when needed. I have also started to enjoy my dance practices again (phew!!) and got back that joy of dancing on the social dance floor. In addition, there has been really great news in my career, which has really put my mood up. Really, the timing could have not been better.

I wanted to write some more of one specific new dance connection that has helped me getting back my dance joy. It was something like three weeks ago when we had our first dance and I felt from the very first move that it was going to be something special between us. You know who I'm talking about if you have seen a glimpse of our dance.

There is just something magical in a really good first dance. You have never met the other person, maybe changed only few words before the dance, and bam, you feel like you have found the missing part of you, like you two are born to dance with one another, like you can read each others minds and hearts. Everything else disappears, there is just you two and the music. Every single move is synchronized, there is no two but one, moving perfectly together, feeling the music exactly the same way. And when the music stops, you both are so overwhelmed of the surprise that just happened that you just stand there, stupefied, not knowing what to say or do. It even feels a bit awkward having revealed so much of you and having learnt so much of the other during the one single song, and there you stand, not knowing the other's name or anything else that you feel you should be knowing, and yet you feel like you know this stranger next to you in some special way no one else does.

Yes, it was exactly like this and exactly what I really needed, right now, right there. Maybe my craving for this kind of dance connection was one reason why I just let go completely. In just few seconds I felt like I trusted this stranger with all my heart and was ready to do whatever he wanted me to do. I had so many feelings going through me during the dance that I can't remember the last time I was able to feel so strongly in the dance floor. When the dance was over, I must have looked so silly, feeling kind of lost, little embarrassed and truly happy at the same time.

Interestingly, that was our only dance that night. It was like, if I try to put it metaphorically, having a first kiss, amazing and mind blowing first kiss, when saying goodbye; the kind of first kiss that wakes up the butterflies in your stomach and leaves them flying around. Not surprisingly, I found myself looking for him in the next dance party. When I finally found him, I was little nervous whether our second dance could reach the same level since now there were these huge expectations and no surprise factor putting the extra something into the feeling. However, the expectations were not let down and there I went again, surrendering myself into our dance.

I've learnt to appreciate these kind of strong dance connections because I know those don't happen often. The beauty of them is that every single one has been special in their own way and have brought up different things and feelings in me. I have been lucky to find two of those during the last six months, and even more lucky that both of them live in the same city and go to the same dance parties that I do. What a lucky girl I am.

I'd like to finish with one song that has been on my playlist a lot during this week. It just somehow hits me right now.